Last Friday night, after a couple of Maker's Mark and Cokes and much tweeting on Twitter, I decided it was a good idea to watch Blazing Saddles and tweet all the great one liners as the movie played. It actually was a blast and folks seemed to get quite a kick out of it. So I'm going to do it again (Tweet the movie; not sure about the drink) with Young Frankenstein (or, "Frahnk-en-shteen") this Friday. So get yourself a Twitter account and follow along!
And here's the transcript from my Friday night Mel Brooks session. See if you can't follow the movie as I go along:
And Bart was his name
What in the wide wide world of sports is going on here?
Send a wire to the main office and tell them I said ... OWWW!
Ditto? Ditto? You provincial putz...
You spare the women?
No, we rape the ... out of 'em at the #6 dance later on
We'll make Rock Ridge think it was a chicken caught in a tractor's nuts
People stampeded. And cattle raped. - murmurrrr
Authentic frontier gibberish
Work work work work. Hello boys have a good night's rest? I missed you.
I didn't get a harrumph out of that guy
Where would I find such a man? ... Why am I asking you?
Can't you see that man is a ni..
The sheriff is a ni..
As chairman of the welcoming committee, it is my privilege to extend a laurel, and hearty handshake to our new ..... n***r
Excuse me while I whip this out
The next man who makes a move, the n***r gets it
Are we awake?
It depends. Are we ... black?
Yes we are.
Then we are awake but very puzzled
Well, my name is Jim but most people call me . . . . Jim
Man, why do you do that to yourself?
Ha, you don't really wanna know that.
I do I do.
Well, if you must pry.
I must I must
Yeah, but I shoot with this hand
You was just pulling my lariat
Well raise my rent. You are The Kid!
I must've killed more men than Cecille B. DeMille
The little bastard shot me in the ass
What's a dazzling urbanite like you doing in a rustic setting like this?
Why don't we give him to Mongo?
The common clay of the new West. You know ... morons
Never mind that shit, here comes Mongo!
Mongo ain't exactly a who - he's more of a what
Candy gram for Mongo.
Sign please. Thank you
Mongo like candy
My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives
Gol darn it Mr. Lamarr. You use your tongue prettier than a 20 dollar whore
Lily von Shtupp, whose very name was bleeped on network tv
[ed. note: For the record it's Lili von Shtupp or 'The Teutonic Titwillow' or 'Lili Lili Lili legs Lili Lili']
Is Bismark a herring?
They are always coming & going & going & coming & always too soon
Oooo. A wed wose. How womantic
Tell me schatzie is it twue what they say about the way you people are gifted?
Oh it's twue it's twue
Don't know. Mongo only pawn in game of life
I want rustlers, cutthroats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, real estate agents, mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwackers, hornswogglers, horsethieves, bulldykes, trainrobbers, bankrobbers, asskickers, shitkickers and ... METHODISTS!
You'd do it for Randolph Scott
Head'em off at the pass? I HATE that cliche
Now you are about to embark on a great crusade to stamp out decency on the West. Now you will only be risking your lives, while I will be risking an almost certain Academy Award nomination for best supporting actor
Now go do that voodoo that you do sooooooo well
Somebody's gotta go back and get a shitload of dimes